Experiences of Tantric Soul Body Intimacy and Intercourse

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

THE GODDESS SHOWS HERSELF

With love and care you nurtured my organic soul
Tending the fertile soil and planting the seeds of your wisdom
From within the darkness growth came forth
As your intent strengthened my resolve

I sat at your feet drinking in your honeyed words
Listening with equal care
Letting them fall like rain onto parched earth
Little knowing who else would over hear

I have a message for you, I know not what it is
The tree which grew when you reached into me
Brings a flower to behold
Can you see its meaning if I draw it for you?

A voice came through the darkness
Do you see me, do you know me?
Will you acknowledge me?
Will you hold me or do you fear the fire?

Easier to sense the physicality of the serpent
Believe in temptation and integrity
Stay strong and with stand the call
But she too knew patience and bided her time

Silently she moved into position
“Try out the whole body sensing”, the whisper came
Innocently I answered the call
Following a deeper instinct to connect to you in love

Your gaze opened me up like a flower in the sun
Like a bee you came this time to drink my honey
We ate of the tree of knowledge
Choosing to fall into each other
Spiralling together into divine bliss

Separate again the distance seemed too vast
Floating within my self fear took hold
Did I go too far?
Is his veil still there, can he yet see her in me?
Retreating into lonely space aching all the while
Your scent lingered to taunt me
I could still see your smile
As we had acknowledged the pleasure of our union

Through that space the answer three times came
My heart swells fit to burst into a thousand songs
Validated into being She looks through my eyes into yours
In doing so becomes part of me as I am part of you.




SNAKES AND LADDERS

What is it like to be a woman
What does feminine mean
Passive, receptive, soft, open

Respond to care and nurture
Blossom, flower, unfold
Take in, receive, comply

Listen, incorporate, digest
Flow upon flow, wave upon wave
Adapt, become adept, grow

Expand, conceive, produce
Be solid, put down roots
Draw in from down below

In being fed capable of feeding
Giving back by opening up
Velvet, voluminous, voluptuous

Joined, floating, dancing,
Active surrender, choosing
Intending, meaning, fulfilled

Separate, alone, halved
Lost, vulnerable, needy
Why? Draw strength

Return to self, go deeper still
Find the well, drink your fill
Empower yourself by yourself

Is that the point, individually
One and one make two
Two halves make a whole

I read that Shakti has two poles
Prana: life force, soul
Kundalini: coiled one, spiritual potential

Whole but sundered
Until Kundalini is woken up
To be reunited with her soul mate, Shiva

Marriage of the gods
Knowledge of authentic self
End of existential suffering

Sounds so simple
Hard to incorporate
Go back and start again
Like a game of reverse snakes and ladders




SOFT AND DELICATE RESONATION

Thicken your thoughts seek words and meaning
Not in what they stand-in for
Feelings, felt-sense equals being
Within is where you’ll find the door

Feel your head until you lose it,
Spiral downwards, deeply go
Well worn paths to inner being
Below your waistline, breathing slow

Feel within the darkness of being
Breathe in dark substantiality
Feel and sense the woods and creatures
You within you, me within me

Baring forth the deeper senses
Feel the wordless inner being
Through the familiar come new horizons
Different aspects now to glean

Outward boundary now expanding
Become one now all-seeing eye
Porously filling up, absorbing
Beyond myself is where you lie

Drawing back with the darkness
Expanding outwards once again
Within the light see colours dancing
The place we meet, now spiralling

Becoming one embodied colour
Red, our natures filled with fire
But what from out the darkness blossoms
Once forgotten can hide no more

Little knowing, deeply sensing
Old reactions lie within
Responding to the light of your gaze
Seeing, scenting, bodying

Protective habit operating
Creates a barrier, sensing pain
Almost frozen, seeking action
Conflicting responses blocking gain

Slow to take on board the process
Hoped for bliss remains a dream
Coiling back in self protection
Wondering what my neck ache means

Emotional pain becomes somatic
Struggle to focus, find a word
Sadness felt and clearly showing
Lost and vulnerable and yet ‘heard’

You demonstrate your inner knowing
Guiding me along the way
Explain the flower deep within me
Soft and delicate you say

That’s not me I beg to differ
Can’t go there it leads to pain
Sensuous is what you tell me
‘Weak’ and ‘vulnerable’ are too lame

Yet again deep-sensing resonation
Washes out and up, throws clear
All the debris once was hidden
Exposing defences that were dear

It takes its toll to keep things hidden
Free the senses, go within
Seek in darkness buried treasure
Release, begin to grow again

I’ll try to heed your words of wisdom
Attempt to keep my senses pure
To free my judgements of past actions
Your healing inner body provides the cure.




GATEAUX

What would it be like to grow up in a world
Where the value of a dessert was judged
By if it had a cherry on the top

To find yourself, many years later,
In a foreign land, entertained by the king
His top chief has prepared for you his speciality

A gateaux, the like of which you have never seen
The sponge as light as angels wings,
Enveloped in cream as smooth as silk
Laced with fruit purée of sun kissed raspberries
Decorated with swirls of rich, dark chocolate

It tastes sublime, and dissolves on your tongue
Your senses reel in delight as your palette sings
The perfect blend of flavours and texture
A symphony of tones, it sings you a song
Never have you tasted anything as exquisite.

So would you recognise its worth?
Realise what a gift has been presented to you
Understand the honour bestowed,
Or would you complain it has to have a cherry on the top?

Have you grown enough to see your taste has changed?
Are you strong enough to disregard the teachings of the past?
Do you know the true value of finding your own path,
And making your own decisions
Can you recognise the reflection of your own soul?
Or would you insist on the cherry?




KALI MAKES HER PRESENCE KNOWN

Seated within the warm sea of knowledge,
Breathing out - sinking down
Rising fluid – breathing in
Awareness shifting, deepening into the abyss
Seeking the eye focused towards the dark.

Concentrating intent, following steps already taken
Eye to eye, being to being, waves of connection
Feeling body extending, contracting
To and fro, within, without – resonating
Sit back into the fluid, re-focus - sink further down.

Eyes looking out see rapid ripples in facial muscles
Awareness moves to stand under
Sensing language - shift to receptive
Allowing intense waves of silent sound to permeate
Suspending the need to know, submit to feeling the words.

A change; waves once crashing begin to lap the shore
The new sound invites, gentle, caressing, smiling
Gathering feelings, checking from top to toe,
Whole sensing body moved to respond, reaching out
Answering the call, goddess to god; opening to receive.

Two body’s sitting opposite, legs and eyes in contact
Two souls - feeling for each other
One penetrating with intention, the other intending reception
Knowingly seeking the source of the divine nectar
Spiritually conjoining our bliss bodies; riding the waves of rapture.

Wave upon wave of divine bliss, sustained with intensity
The abode of the soul pulsating, holding, amplifying
The fire of passion colouring red, burning and creating
The space in between palpable with generated heat

The gravity of your force creating the sensation of physical embrace
As I feel myself fall towards you, inches between our faces
The scent of your soul pervades my being, fulfilling me
Drawing me further into your essence as we dance together
Hardly breathing the air around us; sustained rather by love.

Lost to time and outer senses, floating in a sea of sensuality
Every inner fibre of our dream body,
Each psychic nerve ending, singing
The melody resounding through our souls as we make music together
Each feeling-tone re-forming our inner beings; making us anew.

We draw back, break contact and begin the return.
Insatiable, my eyes offer an invitation and you respond in kind
Feeling bodies once more extended, gently melding, softly enfolding
We smile at our union, communicating our pleasure in each other
Acknowledging the bond between our souls, our love blossoms.

So who was looking through our eyes that day,
Which aspects of our multi-dimensional beings cavorted freely
As you reconnected with a deeper self; who was called to respond to you?

If you are kindly disposed towards me, oh lord, I entreat you to speak fully.
As I sat and drank your amrita, after withstanding the display of your force and voice, was filled and stretched by your power, I now sit at your feet, oh most beloved Gurudev and devotedly ask:

Was it Peter or Vidar who sang and drew forth from my depths.
Was it Ka’ren who responded?
In relation to you; who am I, what is my name?




SHIVA AND SHAKTI

Ever more growth, never ending expansion,
My soul awakened by your call.

Joining together our awareness, combined in exploration
Seeking deep within our hidden depths,
We sensed the dark interiority of each others soul

Ever deeper, discovering seeds of potential
Bringing them into the light of awareness,
Singing them into being, feeding them with love

Shiva called Shakti
And She answered his call.

Given space in light retreat She came forth and danced,
Bought pink beaded glass slippers, painted my toe nails to match.
Embodied by me she grew to fullness, in time with the moon.

Then in golden sun light, under a bright blue sky,
Seated by the glistening, silver sea,
You encountered my Shakti.

Feeling her way to your soul, unaided by your intent,
Me full of awareness; my whole body and yours.

Bringing the gift of warm, sensuality,
Melting the illusionary boundary of outer bodies,
Connecting deep within you,
Seeking Shiva; My Gurudev

You have taught me very well,
Most Beloved Master of My Soul,
You bring me to fullness, time and time again.

Your penetrating seeds of wisdom,
Found my fertile inner ground,
Took root within the dark interior of my being,
Have been tended and nurtured by your deep interest.

Now you can reap my harvest.
Our spirits have danced together in inner and outer space,
We have been colours together, blended together.
We have blossomed together in divine bliss.

All that and yet our journey has only just begun.
How wonderful is that?




WHAT IS THIS PROCESS ALL ABOUT?

What is this process all about?
Stretching and expanding, re-shaping and clearing
The power of two joined through our eyes
Touching each other with our souls.

How incredible to reach in so deep
Beyond the self to inner dimensions
Listening to the silent sounds of All That Is
Creative power of awareness, pure and unsullied.

Opening outwards to take the other in
Conjoining, yoking, combining our intent,
Building slowly, searching within, gathering
From the darkness of the inner body.

Standing under ancient wisdoms
With the ability to make them anew,
Development, growth and forward motion,
Waves of knowledge to feed the desert.

I came to you in darkness
You opened me to the light.

Patiently you tutored me, with deep interest called love,
Awoke the sleeping spirits hidden within
Found more than you had bargained for
So much more than I could have conceived.

What an amazing combination, you and I,
Who would suspect what is lies beneath,
The force of darkness penetrated by light,
Impregnating my soul womb with your seeds.

Time and again our melding and blending
Bring forth intense tones of divine bliss
Conceiving with sounds in silence
Rapidly growing, gestating and forming.

My labour pains of expansion and contraction,
My birthing partner standing strong,
Ready to deliver the fruits of our journeys
Words and letters formed into gnosis.

Learning together as partners do
As you feed me so I feed you,
Building our strength for future endeavours,
Both knowing the roles we were born to do.

Divine nectar is our food of love,
Nourishing our inner bodies, our souls,
We drink our fill through each other,
Languishing in each others delight.

The black soul womb of Kali,
The bowl of serpent power,
Tapping into erotic passions
Embodying the divine powers of creation.

Making ready to set the world on FIRE.




KALI - AN EPIC

Understanding the inner resonance of words - Mantra.
Knowledge deepening,
Awareness descending,
Power expanding.

Adopting the usual positions to discover something new,
Eyes closed to connect to inner being,
Opening the windows of the soul to let the other in,
Fully aware of whole sensing bodies.

Come to me Black goddess of the Night,
Fill me with your darkness,
Burn me with your fire,
Set me aflame to re-shape myself.

Who am I now?
What am I becoming?
Will I even recognise myself?
Who else will know me?

Only You.

And who are You who sees Me?
Master of My Soul,
What am I to You,
Your Black Magic Woman, embodying Kali?

She knew how to treat men,
Cutting off their hands and heads,
Standing over Shiva to dominate the world,
Withdrawing into the darkness to create anew.

Dancing beneath the stars,
Black night speckled with distant fires,
I Recall and remember the passion,
Feeling the beat of the baseline.

Dance with me Oh goddess of the night,
Fill me with your awareness,
Remind me of your erotic nature,
Unrestrained and pulsating with life,
Full of longing and burning red.

My body was full of rising and descending scales,
Singing wordlessly, playing on your soul,
Seeking, searching, embracing and receiving,
Bow down in reverence and see the love that shines.

For love there is in darkness,
No light without the black.
All consuming flame of passion,
Burning deep and raw within my soul.

What am I to make of all this?
I feel myself changed, transformed.
I eclipse myself, earth blocking out the sun,
No light shines from my surface.

Hands together in worship,
Penetrate my feeling, sensual self,
So deep within my divine dark soul,
The shadow side of bliss no less intense.

Longing; deep and unfulfilled,
Craving, craven, creative creature of the dark,
Bringing heady intoxicating nectar,
Stretching me yet again, making me grow.

Studying my own creation: a Magnolia flower,
Purely white, yet deeply pink, with its dark stem,
I recall your words of longing and patience
Use them to clarify my thoughts and feelings.

The roots of the tree grow deep within,
Drawing life from the darkest soil,
Allowing the elemental gods to bring forth
Such delicately beautiful flowers.

The tree stands alone, complete in its being,
Yet I need you to find my way,
Groping through the darkness, half blind, half knowing,
Following the scent of your soul.

Trusting, always and completely,
Never knowing what shore
I will find myself washed up on,
How battered and bruised I will feel.

Seeking out primordial powers,
Daring to be so bold,
Drawing and drinking the dark amber fluid:
The very elixir of life,

We take these journeys together,
Face to face, but like the tree
Rooted in our own inner being
Creating pathways to the gods.

Into the wordless darkness,
Wading through sensations of erotic pleasure
Trying to maintain an inner ground
Blazing trails for others to follow.

Confusion leads to insight,
Hopes dashed cause growth,
Mistakes the greatest teacher,
To stay aware and connected!

Struggle against unknown currents,
Trying to stay afloat,
Why do I do this to myself?
What inner being drives me?

Questions, questions always questioning myself:
My motives, my abilities and my spiritual strength.
Battling with emotions
Trying not to be swept away.

Reconnect, remember: Whole Body Awareness.
If you play with fire
You risk getting your fingers burnt.
What do We risk medalling with such flames?

Am I burnt or just singed around the edges?
I know I will be back for more,
Moved by a love that could consume me
Allowing these waves to wash me ashore.

In changing I move away from what I know,
Those who I thought I loved don’t understand.
I move towards isolation, fearing being alone.

Can you understand my distress?
I see compassion in your eyes.
But I don’t know Me any more.

All I thought I knew swept away,
Replaced by what?
A power I am yet to control or understand.

Creating space around me, my mouth kept shut,
I feel untouchable, yet long for touch,
Set adrift upon a sea which feels so deep.

The agony and the ecstasy,
Chewed up by Kali and spat out,
Waiting like a phoenix to rise again from the ashes.




CRADLES IN HER DARK EXPANSIVE WOMB

Playing on each others soul,
Like beautiful string instruments
Sounds ringing through our inner bodies
Perfectly in tune.

With delightful ease we slip
Into our deeper selves, sensing and reaching,
Aware of your soul touching mine
I open like a flower kissed by the sun.

Hard to recall the intricate steps of our dance,
So deep do we spiral down,
Watching changes in facial expression,
Mirroring, holding, amplifying with intent.

Such vastness within and without,
Ever expanding vistas open to the sides,
Spacious souls encompass each other,
Exploring together, how far can we go.

Upwards you indicate and down,
I stretch, feel, in both directions
At the same time moving towards the unknown
Remember sounds and names in darkness.

Was it now or maybe later,
I heard Her name ring through the dark
Calling to Her loyal servants
Cradled in Her dark expansive womb.

You hear me sound Her name
We recognise our roles of worship; Kaula!
See and follow the others expression
Amplifying intensive feelings, revel in bliss

Fully aware of our combined power
Knowledge expressed and clear to see
Smiling our pleasure, enjoying each other,
Plucking cords, strumming gently, sounding deeply.

With intensity of gaze our excitement rises
From deep within the dark interiority
Registering through our breathing,
We scent and sense each others soul.

You shift so suddenly I jump and follow
Another dimension, deeper still
You lead me further sinking, descending
I lose my self and with another fill.

My inner voice speaks, silently, another language
Gentle, rocking, soothing sounds,
Among the many now forgotten, your name;
Sh’meyah, all that is recalled.

Did I draw you in through my eyes
Or did I open in response to you?
Whoever began the other followed
I felt your soul expand and penetrate mine.

How could I help myself?
You’re familiar and so very welcome,
Embracing you with all I am
My love expanding, encompassing, enfolding you.

How wonderfully we join together
No resistance, no need for force
Making space for deeper expressions
New aspects shine out through our eyes.

Diving deep in the sea of awareness
Pearls of wisdom gathered forth
Such a joy to take the journey
Touching each other with sweet sensuality.

What power within our eyes,
What intensity of will and gaze,
Passions raging, rising from fathoms below
Contained and relished, a mutual exchange of joy.




GARDEN OF EDEN / SEASONS OF BEING

I write these words from deep with me
From the darkest depths they rise like trees
Seeded by you into my dark soul womb
During our spiritual conjoining, our blissful union

My love for you knows no bounds
I can feel it grow, forever expanding and enriching
Within your gaze my true being has blossomed
Like a bud to the sun I opened my self to you.

Deep inside me I have allowed you to explore
And you have responded in kind to me
Our souls yearn to mingle, meld and merge
We experience such pleasure in being so entwined.

Like a bubble rising to the surface of my awareness
I sense my feelings grow from deep within
Longing to reach into you, to sense and touch you
To become one as we link the power of our gaze.

Your being pervades mine, in my dreams I see you
Reliving the sensual moments spent floating within
Sustaining eye contact, intense and so intimate
Relishing the feelings of our inner beings, blissful and divine

Being aware of my whole sensing body
I use it to sense the outside of yours
As boundaries of self expand we encounter each other
Waves of sensual pleasure at as we touch with our souls

When I first met you I knew I could trust you
Allowing you to search deep into my eyes
Like an innocent child with secret knowledge
A sleeping beauty awoken by her spirit lover’s first kiss

I had no idea such joy was possible
Had almost shut down my bruised and battered heart
But the warmth of your gaze fell deep within me
Through the chinks in my armour your light found its way

I thought I had soul, but not like this one
Reality more than I bargained for
Washing away the old patterns of being
Wave upon wave washed me ashore

Like a tiny seed my self expanded
Swollen by the fluid and warmth of your love
So tenderly you nurtured my pains of growing
Always there, feeding me with words of wisdom

Taking pleasure in my emerging awareness
My blossoming self caused you to grow too
Surprisingly we fed each other
Finding divine nectar in dark hidden places

Like Nature herself, given the right conditions
The unexpected finds the space to spring
The birds of spirit playing their part
Leaving surprises for us to discover and enjoy

Rapidly we have moved through seasons of being
The autumn brought seeds to gather and sow
Harvesting, planting, more growth, more blossoms
A veritable Garden of Eden, within, for us to roam

Like all committed gardeners our greatest pleasure
To share the fruits of our labours and bliss
Gathering and planting our seedlings of knowledge
Gifts for others to take away and themselves enjoy

If they follow your carefully developed steps of wisdom
Perhaps a forest or meadow to find and explore
No bounds to expansion as Nature runs rampant
Our message; free your senses, come follow our lead

Take the paths which we have trodden
Expand your awareness, seek and develop your soul
Treasure awaits those brave to follow their Gnosis
The bliss of spiritual union is all of ours to enjoy.




PAIN AND SERPENTS

Spiralling into pain, deep and hidden
Connecting through my soul but feeling it in my body
Deeper than I had expected, rendering me in two
Allowing the experience to fill me and show on my face

Longing, unfulfilled, craving, wanting thwarted
The darkest, deepest bowl of agony
A vast cavern, dripping walls of blood and gore
The soul womb of Kali the destroyer

Seeking further into the past, centuries of blood and death
Finding strength somehow lies in the darkness
The power to create and expand
Intent fills my eyes as I feel it rise within me

Do not give me your pity,
Wipe any sympathy from your face
I am strong, invincible, as I feed on the pain
Nourishing my inner body the response of my soul is to grow

Feeling for you with my spirit as it expands into yours
The bliss of our union intense and resounding
Pulsating with erotic pleasure as I feel you respond
Recognising that look on your face, mirroring my own

We draw in close and closer still
Our rapid breath mingles, I feel your warmth on my lips
Revelling in our rapture, giving and receiving
Our pleasure mounts as we recognise each others passion

Retreating slightly, drawing back to take another look
Fall into the pain, reliving and recalling
Deeper than before, another level of awareness
You asked for it so you can have it, feel it, see it

It does not consume me, it is you who takes me in
Swallowed whole within your vast expanse
Loosing touch with any physical body
My whole sensing soul enwrapped in your darkness
Sensing sound rising I silently speak her name: Kali
Expanding outwards I follow your lead
All seeing eye I feel into the surrounding space
Kaula: Feel behind and upwards, into you and down, deeper down

Such depths of being, fathoms of soul space
Spiralling through sounds and further into the pain
But the pain is there no longer, vitality is what I find
Moving beyond the point of other experience

Completely blended, melded, as one are we
Pure power of awareness creating deeper bonds
Tremendous sensations of bodied soul depths
Waves of intent boring into each others eyes

Sitting back to view the other
Then spiralling, yet deeper still
The power of Mantra takes us in further
As your hand moves to the space in between

I feel you penetrate my spiritual yoni
Your intent glowing from your eyes
I open soul self to receive you
My whole sensing body welcomes your touch

Ah, the waves of rapture begin again
I feel them rise from deep within
Such blissful sensations as I fill with your awareness
Pumping, pulsating, building and mounting

My breathing suddenly turns to rapid as my eyes expand
Incredible sense of erotic pleasure
Wave upon wave of bliss to ride
Holding the moment to intensify the feeling

Amplified and thus returned
Boring my intent now into your eyes
Wanting you to feel what I am feeling
Seeing your receive my pleasure thrills and excites me

Sustaining the bliss we feed each other
Melding, entwining floating in passion
Our deep connection of soul and love
As sounds explode with shock waves of vibration

Closing our eyes we stay in-touch with feelings
Colours come dancing before my inner eyes
Yellow, intense with spiralling patterns, a cosmic display
Serpents rise before me, entwining and frolicking

Circles of light and colour shoot through each other
Multi-coloured, divine, snakes of power and pleasure
Writhing, twisting a dance of glee and delight
As intense violet fills my third eye

A wonderful display of blissful movement
An inner vision from deep within
The frenetic pace begins to slacken
Rhythmic coils slowly unwind

Such pleasure to watch the joy of their union
Symbolic enactment of where we had been
Incredible journeys of conjoining our bliss bodies
Amazingly sensuous dialogue of our inner beings.




THE PATH OF TRUTH

What is there to forgive?
My emotions blinded me to the truth;
Love is not greedy!

My judgment and pain came from the past
An outdated belief in exclusivity
You have taught me better than that!
It is I who should apologise to you.

Being your student is no simple path !
I now see the great reserves of strength required
The power and resolve to continually die.

Retreating into the black soul-womb of Kali
Dying from my perceived wounds
Our Mother held me, healed me and sent me home, to you

Finding resolution I was re-born
Stronger, yet with infantile vulnerability
Until I found myself once again, reflected in your eyes

It was your unswerving gaze which melted my ice-locked heart
Opening the doors of my mouth as well as my soul
Allowing me to trust again, in you, to hear of my pain
Knowing the strength of our connection

And what a powerful message we contain
The power of love and acceptance
The ability to stand under a torrent of feeling
Bowed but not cowered

Fearless of the darkness
Knowing the creativity imminent in destruction
We can retreat with intent and be re-born.

It was within the darkness that I began to see
Even while preparing to sever the umbilical cord,
Which tied my soul to yours,
Knowing it was the right thing to do

I took back the power
I had given to you for safe-keeping
You have tended it well, with love and care
Now I am afraid of it no more.

I am touched deep within by your words
This time in pleasure not in pain
The waves so strong I struggle to body them
Trans-substantiated into tears of joy

What is there to make-up for?
Your poem is balm enough for healing scars
Battle scars born with pride
A brief if fierce skirmish with my Beast

But like the Beauty also contained within
I looked and loved my jealous heart
Transformed my pain to my own advantage
Returned to face the truth
To see with new eyes.

You acted with impeccability
There is nothing to hold you to account for;
Love is the law, love under will
And I will love you, no matter what you do

Because I understand your integrity
Because I am committed to your path
Because I chose to walk with you
Into the darkness and through to the other side

However many times I have to make the journey
Because I know I am never alone,
However lonely I allow myself to feel
Because I know the power of love.




THE SOUL-SPIDER'S WEB OF SUPPORT

What do I recall?
What dare I remember of our latest union
Rapidly descending into our soul depths
Trying to stay impersonal but loaded with love

The pleasure and power of connecting with each other again
As if our time apart awoke a hunger and urgency
The thrill of that familiar look on your face
That knowing recognition reflected in our eyes

Extending my feeling body to meet yours
Clear intent shinning in your gaze
Or was it what I wanted to see?
Aware as I was of my knees trembling between yours

Anticipation and expectation, hope and longing
Jostle for position as I sense your whole being with mine
Opening myself to receive you
Feeling and sensing your love expand within me

How can I describe what I experienced
In purely spiritual terms
The words which spring to mind full of sexual reference
Or did I imagine the movement of your hips?

The serpentine writhing of your body, was that real too?
The sense of you moving your pelvis into a position
As if my legs were open instead of clamped between yours
Feeling my soul body respond where my outer one was still

And I, brazen hussy that I am
Moving in rhythm to accommodate your spirit
Relishing the thrust felt so deep within
Wanting and encouraging you to penetrate the yoni of my soul

Feeling and loving every movement, each second stretched
Bodying the sensations of intense sensuality
Enjoying your face mirroring my response to our dance of love
The animal expression, wolf-like, predatory and deeply erotic

Matching your rhythm and mudra with reciprocal intent
Contracting the power in my hara to reflect back my feelings
Holding the movement to intensify the bliss
Quivering with the sensations so powerfully expressed
Almost panting in pleasure as wave upon wave explodes within

Guttural sounds escape your lips
Giving voice to those I feel
Groaning in response, full of love and longing
As I feel my self fill with your awareness

Wrapping my soul body around you
I feel my being inside you at the same time
Stroking your inner body with mine
Seductively rubbing my spirit against yours

Arousal felt on so many levels, floating in a sea of bliss
Swept away to languish in satisfaction
Breathing in the breath of each other
Inhaling the scent of our conjoined souls

Thus inspired by you I open completely
All centres linked by a black-red yawning cave
Out-flowing with a fluid of feeling
Gentle yet strong, sensuously soft and enfolding

Flow upon flow rising up and outwards
Encompassing you and beyond into space
A never ending well surges forth
As my love pores out, my being expands
Keeps on enlarging and sensing all the while, like an eye, all-seeing

By this point we had changed position
Sitting back into a different dimension of feeling
So deep within my self and in resonation with you
Almost out of contact range, struggling to focus

Aware of your arm slowly sweeping up and towards me
Over my head but surrounding me at the same time
I feel the pressure of your thumb on my third eye
The power pushes me back into a web of support
An inward sensation of falling backwards, yet feeling contained

Your hands take my head and move it forwards,
Did I imagine you stroking my hair?
With eyes closed a black hole opens before me
I see a column of technological junk disappear downwards
I experience myself similarly falling, and endless descent

Opening my eyes I see you no longer, you’ve gone, moved away
Yet I keep falling like Alice into wonderland
Sinking deeper still within my own being
Not knowing if it will stop or should I halt myself
I begin the long journey back to my body.